"It's with your sins that you have killed me, thinking of your sins I die"

There once was a girl who lived a very boring life. She bought albums by artists such as Dio, and she was very depressed. One day, she bought a CD which immediately caught her attention. "What's this?" she asked herself. "I feel like.. I should be dancing!" And she proceeded to do just that. As she listened to it more and more, she loved it more and more! She rapidly became obsessed with it and the band itself, and there begins our tale.

In a bleak world where we are overpopulated by clones of Good Charlotte, Nickelback, Chingy, etc, it's hard to stumble upon anything original or even likable. Well, maybe only in the US. Not sure how things go in other countries. Nothing can be as bad as America's music scene. Anyway, the wonderful CD that has changed lives all over the globe is Scotland's very own Franz Ferdinand, with their self titled debut album. Which was released last year. (It's January! So like, 2004 was last year! ..Wow, ain't I funny?!)

Overhyped? I think not. Actually, who knows, maybe they did receive a lot of media attention, but I wouldn't know about that. Until very recently, all the music I listened to was Jrock, thank you very much. I hadn't heard anything that might influence my decision when I first gave this CD a listen, and I was very pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed it. It was a breath of fresh air, a feeling of "What?? There's still good music in the world?", and one may even relate it to the emotions a pimp feels once a new ho has made him proud.

Franz Ferdinand, consisting of Alex Kapranos on vocals and guitar, Nick McCarthy on guitar, Bob Hardy on bass, and Paul Thomson on drums, set out with a very specific goal when they originally formed the band: they wanted to make music for girls to dance too. They accomplished that goal a helluva better than anyone else out there, and even made music for boys to dance to as well. The boys should be allowed to dance too, you know..

It doesn't hurt that the first song on the album is called Jacqueline. I have a bond with it. It starts off quietly, and you can really appreciate Alex's vocals. Soon, frantic bass cords are played, and this turns into a fun, sing-along-to-able number, with a chorus consisting of "It's always better on holiday, so much better on holiday, that's why we only work when we need the money." It's a good philosophy, but I prefer to just not work at all and be done with it. Of course, that severely damages my plan to fly to Scotland and go on a cycle ride with Alex.. But anyway. Great way to begin the CD, and I love it muchly. This is followed by the odd little Tell Her Tonight, which shouldn't work, but it does. The beat is strange, yet you can still manage to dance to it. In all its absurdity and weirdness, I gotta love it. Nick does the vocals for this one (Alex does backing) and his high voice works well with everything else. The music is hard to describe, and I feel I'm being too vague, but if you can groove to it, I mean, what else matters?

Franz's biggest hit has got to be Take Me Out, and if you don't know it, I pity you. It sounded vaguely familiar to me when I first listened to the CD, so if crazed Jrock girl knew it, you should too. When it begins, it's pretty tame, yet the guitar is quite catchy. Alex sings about how he is waiting for you if you're lonely, and at the line "I know I won't be leaving here, with you" the song suddenly begins to transform. It morphs into an amazing funky toe tapping (scratch that, foot stomping is more accurate), booty shaking beat that no normal human being should be able to resist. The effect it has on the body is insane; you immediately start to move to the music and sing along with lines such as "I say don't you know, you say you don't know, I say take me out," and you are led to the conclusion that this is, indeed, funk, even though that may not have been your original hypothesis.

Another single (not in America, though) follows next: Dark of the Matinee. Guitar and bass make the beginning of this song, and the bass and drums make the verses. The buildup to the chorus is enough to get you bouncing, and I just love singing along with it in all its fast paced glory. The delivery of the lines is handled masterfully by Alex, who is my god at the moment, and he sounds suitably soft as he sings lines like "Time every journey to bump into you accidentally," and his voice is tinged with a bit of contempt when he sings of "all the words I hate, all the clothes I hate, oh I'll never be anything I hate." Nick likes to randomly scream "dark of!" when the guys perform this live. In the video, his guitar has a "solo" button. Is that his secret?

The amazing tracks just keep coming. Auf Achse hit me as a goodie when I first listened to the CD. It starts out with a few synthesized keys, but not crazed synths like Britney Spears; pretty ones. I think Alex's vocals on this song are some of his best, and sometimes I get chills (because I suck really, really bad) when he sings "You see her, you can't touch her, you hear her, you can't hold her, you want her, you can't have her, you want to, but she won't let you." He sounds so soft, earnest, and longing. I want to give him a big hug (and offer to go on a cycle ride with him). His tone changes to scathing as he spits out "She's not so special so look what you've done boy," and it's like, damn boy, what the hell did you do? One of my favorite parts of the song is when Alex quickly delivers lines that no one I make listen to the song can seem to understand, but they go like this: "And now I'm nailed above you, gushing from my side, it's with your sins that you have killed me, thinking of your sins I die, thinking how you let them touch you, how you never realise, that I'm ripped and hang forsaken, knowing never will I rise again." Now that I've rambled around 90 years about this song, I think we can move on. Hopefully I conveyed how much I love it?

My least favorite from the album comes next, not to say that it isn't a good song. Cheating on You just isn't anything excellent. I really like the intro and it seems very promising; the distortion/fuzziness factor is also cool but.. there's just something missing. I think perhaps everything is too jumbled together. But I do enjoy the shouts of "cheating on you!" thrown in every once in awhile. Not a horrible song, and I do like it, but I don't love it. It's only 2:36 long too, so it's a quick little 'un.

This Fire be Franz's current single, and I remember seeing it on TV a few days after I bought the CD. I squealed and taped it. Yes, I'm a dork. The little cymbal tingling and guitar chords create an immediately recognizable intro which makes me happy. The guitar work for this is what stands out the most, and the freakishly catchy chorus of "This fire is out of control, we're gonna burn this city, burn this city" will probably be stuck in your head a long time after the song ends. The simple, short verses are just an excuse for Alex to test the sultry side of his vocals on us, and hey, I'm all for that. The obsession with eyes also continues; they're pretty much worked into all the songs. The big finale for this one is some rapid, frantic guitar strumming that could signify that they have indeed started the fire they were talking about, and it's spreading quite quickly.

Ah, Darts of Pleasure. Their first single (again, not in America) and a great choice. A very bass driven song; it's always there, it opens the song, Bob's amazing, tralala. Not to lessen the impact of the guitar and drums, mind you. And the vocals, of course. Alex singing about darts of pleasure can never be bad. Quite a suggestive little song, with lines like "I want this fantastic passion," and "Skin can feel my lips they tingle, tense anticipation." Plus there's some random German at the end, which is very fun to sing along with. German is one of my favorite languages, so imagine the joy I felt when all four of the guys launched off into it. I really like the video for this too. Seeing Alex brush his teeth was a life changing experience, and it's interesting how most of it was shot from the point of view of Alex's very fine mouth.

"Could there be more singles?" you may be asking yourself. There could, my friend. Michael is yet another single, and perhaps a risque choice. But yeah, this baby wasn't released as a single in America either (gotta love it!) It's oozing with all kinds of homoerotic innuendo even though none of the guys are homosexual. This song was actually written about a real guy named Michael, and some action that went down in a club in Glasgow, not secret desires and whatnot. It has an instantly recognizable guitar intro, and it's such a wonderful little number. I want to dance just like a beautiful dancewhore when it comes on, and I don't believe singing along to any other chorus is as fun as this one. "Michael you're the boy with all the leather hips, sticky hair, sticky hips, stubble on my sticky lips/ Michael you're the only one I'd ever want, only one I'd ever want, only one I'd ever want/ Beautiful boys on a beautiful dancefloor/ Michael you're dancing like a beautiful dancewhore/ Michael waiting on a silver platter now/ Nothing matters now!" I love the verses too, with Alex saying "This is what I am, I am a man, so come and dance with me Michael" and "So sexy, I'm sexy, so come and dance with me Michael" among other things, in such a lustful, sultry voice. In the lyric book, the x-ed out line lets you know just how horny someone was when they wrote this. And that someone says the x-ed out line when they perform it live.

The two songs that end the CD are excellent as well. Come on Home has some great guitar work, particularly at the beginning, and there's a little bit of synth keyboard action, but it's very tame and doesn't take away from the song at all. Funky song, indeed. Alex spats out "Replace you easily, replace pathetically" and it makes me happy. The last line pleads "So come on home/ But don't forget to leave." 40' has an awesome intro and the music just rocks in general. Its funkiness makes me want to stomp my feet and clap my hands, and when is that ever a bad thing? This is also the ultimate song to sing "la la la" along with, because hey, Alex does it too! So if you're ever singing la la la, and people don't think you're singing a real song, you can inform them you are. The buildup at the end with the insane guitar is just plain amazing, and I just want the song to go on, but it is indeed a great song to end the CD with.

This CD is easily one of my favorites, I don't even know how to express my love for it. The combination of the vocals, the music, the funkiness, the lyrics, the danceability.. it all creates an ultra fantastic smash CD. Especially for being their first. It'll be hard to top, but I'm sure they can do it, because they are Franz Ferdinand and Franz Ferdinand = your god. Check this album out, I can't recommend it enough!