James Patterson - 1st to Die

Any book cover with a picture of the Golden Gate Bridge or any other San Francisco landmark immediately catches my eye. That is how I first saw the latest release of James Patterson. I picked it up and read the inside cover which talked about a team of 4 women; detective (Lindsay Boxer), medical examiner (Claire Washburn), reporter (Cindy Thomas) and district attorney (Jill Bernhardt), working together as the Woman?s Murder Club to solve a series of murders. The serial killer this time has an infatuation with brides and gets his jollies from killing off the bride (and groom) on their wedding night, violating the bride in some outlandish way and then posing the couple in a sexual act. Agreed, this killer has some things to work out in therapy.

It sounded good but instead of dishing out outrageous amounts of cash for it, I immediately put my name on the waiting list at the local library. Here?s why.

I?ve never been much of a Patterson fan. I?ve read some of his early works and have tried, unsuccessfully, to get involved in others several times. There is something about his style that just doesn?t catch me. Perhaps it is because he tries to be a master of details without really giving any. To the average reader, Patterson may seem to be a whiz at detailing autopsies and investigative work. To someone with several years of law enforcement classes and experience working with detectives in the real world, James comes up more than slightly short.

1st To Die continues in similar fashion to his other works I?ve read. Although he does have a new host of characters to start with this time, I fear the worse for this all female cast.

I may be way off base here but from reading this book, I get the idea that Patterson doesn?t think much of women himself. He bases his entire book, and most likely a whole series of future books, on a female detective that immediately falls head over heels in puppy love with the new partner she is given by the Major?s office to ?control? things because he has ?deep eyes and soft hands?! At the scene of the second murder, a reporter, Cindy Thomas, shows up. Instead of showing her the road, Lindsay decides to hitch a ride home with the woman and before they make it back to the City, they are chummy-chummy best friends.

And what about the idea that Cindy usually works the Metro desk but just happens to get up to the scene of the first murder (because our super detective forgot to have anyone secure the freight elevator) so her boss lets her continue to run with it. This is portrayed as a nationwide front-page story and little Cindy ?who?? from Metro gets the inside scoop. Is this Patterson?s first book? Maybe because this is ?summer time? reading, we are expected to put our brains on a shelf and pick them up when we are done.

Lite books ? read great, less filling!

Additionally, the big ?break? in the case comes when the lead Medical Examiner decides to test some samples that she hadn?t bothered to run because she ?assumed? they were from the victims? (Doesn?t Patterson know what happens when you @ss/u/me?) This doesn?t give me much hope for the future of crime solving in Patterson?s San Francisco.

These women seem happiest when they are sitting around drinking margaritas and talking about their past sexual exploits.

All four of the lead characters are rather shallow. Maybe that?s because it?s the first time for these characters. Maybe it?s because Patterson doesn?t have the time to go into a great deal of depth for his characters in order to keep up with his monthly quota of new best sellers.

Given the fact that the 4 women are likely going to continue on for many books to come and make James even richer, I?ll bet you can?t guess who is expendable in this book.

Let me give you one more little tidbit to make you roll your eyes. In the middle of the case, Lindsay discovers that she has a rare blood disease that could be fatal but really only serves to make you root for her to succeed against unbelievable odds. This made me think of the old joke, ?Why is it that everyone with a past life was always someone famous? Why wasn?t anyone ever ?Joe Peasant???

Why is it that book characters always have some rare disease? Why doesn?t anyone ever suffer from some common disease that can kill you? But I digress?

If you are a James Patterson fan, you will probably enjoy this book and the new cast of characters. If you are looking for something to read at the beach that doesn?t require you to think at all, you might like this book. If you enjoy harlequin romances, you might enjoy this book except for the murder scene descriptions.

If you like to try to figure out ?who did it?, you?ll probably dislike this book. If you think that co-workers should be able to solve a case without doing the ?bump and grind?, you?ll dislike this book. If you are hoping for a strong female cast of characters, you?ll dislike this book. If you have any knowledge of criminal investigations, you?ll hate this book.

If you?d like a better way to spend a couple of hours with a good mystery, I suggest watching the Discovery channel on Tuesday night for the ?Real Detectives? and assorted real crime cases. If you don?t get the Discovery channel, even ?CSI ? Crime Scene Investigation? will beat this book.

Thanks for reading!